Zero Hour! (1957).

The Scoop:
Stop me if you've heard this one before -- a cross-country flight is put in peril when the entire crew and several passengers get sick with food poisoning and it's up to shaky, battle-scarred former fighter pilot Ted Styker to land the plane with a little help from a tough-as-nails pilot on the ground.

This is better known as the plot of "Airplane!" but the Zucker-Abrahams-Zucker team didn't think it up themselves. While their film was a spoof of '70s disaster movies like the "Airport" series, they lifted their plot, characters, and even whole scenes and chunks of dialogue, wholesale from "Zero Hour!"

Dana Andrews plays Stryker, a decorated Canadian World War II pilot whose post-traumatic stress disorder keeps him out of the air until he's forced to board a cross-country flight to keep his wife (Linda Darnell) from leaving him. Naturally, the fog gets thick and the fish is bad, so Stryker winds up in the cockpit and it's up to Capt. Treleaven (Sterling Hayden, channeling Jack Webb) to talk him through it.

ZAZ skewered this thing so thoroughly that it's hard to watch it seriously now. But on its own, its a taut little thriller that's marred slightly by hamminess and some unintentional humor. Still a load of fun, though.

Best Bit:
The ventriloquist act, which belongs in a ZAZ movie.

Side Note:
The pilot is played NFL Hall-of-Famer Elroy "Crazylegs" Hirsch.

Companion Viewing:
"Airplane!" (1980), of course.

Links:
IMDb.
A transcript annotated with notes on what was later used in "Airplane!"

Take a Look:
The trailer:


A side-by-side comparison of "Zero Hour!" and "Airplane!":

Deep Impact (1998).

The Scoop:
The less commercially successful of 1998's two killer asteroid movies, this is the more creatively successful (not that "Armageddon" provided much competition in that area), creating what could be termed a kinder, gentler disaster movie.

Téa Leoni is an ambitious television reporter on the trail of a government cover-up, only to discover that the fact being covered up is the existence of a giant comet on a collision course with Earth, which the government is trying to destroy without alarming the public. The story gets out, though, with all the usual results.

Director Mimi Leder and writers Bruce Joel Rubin and Michael Tolkin shift the focus away from the pyrotechnics in favor of the human reactions to impending disaster (and a less-than-happy ending), creating a film that, though occasionally predictable, still manages to stand out among its genre. The cast is filled with solid actors, but the standouts include Robert Duvall as the gruff astronaut leading the comet destruction team; Morgan Freeman, lending his commanding presence to the role of the president; and Elijah Wood and Leelee Sobieski as the young amateur astronomer and his girlfriend who discover the asteroid.

Sure, "Deep Impact" is still a Big Dumb Blockbuster, but it is at least one with more heart than one would otherwise expect.

Best Line:
"Look on the bright side. We'll all get high schools named after us."

Side Note:
The scene of the president's address to the world originally included the line, "This is not armageddon." But that was cut out when the studio realized that the film would be in theaters around the same time as "Armageddon."

Companion Viewing:
"Armageddon" (1998).

Links:
IMDb.
Disaster Movie World.

Take a Look:
The trailer:


BOOM! The money shot. (Spoilers!):

Kingdom of the Spiders (1977).

The Scoop:
This entry in the late-'70s wave of evil spider movies is pretty much just like all the others -- except this one has William Shatner, which really puts it over the top.

The Shat plays a studly cowboy veterinarian with the soap opera ready name of Rack Hansen who goes to a small Arizona town to investigate a rash of unexplained livestock deaths. It turns out, of course, that the deaths are caused by a gang of angry tarantulas who eventually take over the town, give everyone the willies and deliver an Important Ecological Lesson along the way. Basically, it starts out like "Jaws" and ends up like "The Birds."

Veteran Z-grade exploitation star John "Bud" Cardos directed this and does a technically credible job. But the script from Alan Caillou and Richard Robinson is a turd, the supporting cast (including Woody Strode, Tiffany Bolling and Altovise Davis) is overwrought and Shatner has the smarm set on overdrive. Plus just about every '70s ecological disaster film cliché is crammed onto the screen.

In other words, it's a hoot. But if you have issues with spiders and couldn't stomach the other spider movies, you won't be able to stomach this one, either.

Best Line:
"I don't think DDT's gonna kill 'em."

Side Note:
Cardos worked a lot of jobs behind the camera during his career on the fringes of Hollywood. But of most relevance here was his experience as a bird wrangler for Hitchcock on "The Birds."

Companion Viewing:
"The Giant Spider Invasion" (1975) and "Tarantulas: The Deadly Cargo" (1977).

Links:
IMDb.
X-Entertainment.

Take a Look:
The trailer:


Check out opening. It has everything you need -- an awesome theme song, star quality bovine acting and sexually charged banter about animal vaccinations. And, believe it or not, the movie's just getting warmed up:

The Concorde: Airport '79 (1979).

The Scoop:
This (mercifully) final installment in the "Airport" series reaches a zenith of silliness -- surpassing even the jumbo-jet-on-the-ocean-floor of "Airport '77" -- and provides most of the fodder for the hilarious "Airplane!"

A goodwill flight from Washington to Moscow is interrupted by missles, fighter planes, Charo's chihuahua and other intrigue. Along the way, the French pilot (Alain Delon) has lots of sex, Jimmie Walker gets high and plays the saxophone, Martha Raye gets tossed around the bathroom, Avery Schreiber makes funny faces and, best of all, George Kennedy dogfights with a pair of F-15s armed only with a flare gun. But wait, there's more! The seemingly endless cast list also includes Robert Wagner, Sylvia Kristel, Susan Blakely, David Warner, John Davidson, Eddie Albert, Cicely Tyson and a host of others.

It's all total trash. But it's highly entertaining trash. There's not a whole lot more to say about it except, damn, what a turkey. (But I mean that in the nicest possible way.)

Best Line:
"Well, it's called the 'cockpit' for a reason..."

Side Note:
The concorde used in the film was sold to Air France after the production, and it is the same plane that crashed on takeoff from Paris in July 2000, becoming France's worst air disaster.

Companion Viewing:
"Airplane!" (1980) and the other films in the "Airport" series.

Links:
IMDb.
Cool Cinema Trash.
The Agony Booth.

Take a Look:
The trailer:


Charo!

Airport '77 (1977).

The Scoop:
Ah yes, the 1970s disaster film -- where old actors go to die. This time around (the third of the four "Airport" films), the old Hollywood warhorses making fools of themselves are James Stewart, Olivia de Haviland and Joseph Cotten, all with their glory days far behind them.

The plot involves a huge airliner full of important people that sinks to the bottom of the Bermuda Triangle thanks to a botched hijacking attempt. Also along for the ride with the aging vets are a host of younger stars such as Jack Lemmon, Brenda Vaccaro, Christopher Lee, Monte Markham, Lee Grant (in an absolutely insane performance) and, of course, "Airport" series stalwart George Kennedy.

All the clichés (not to mention plot absurdities) are on parade. This film is very '70s -- intensely '70s, painfully '70s. It's cream puffs like this that the Zucker/Abrams/Zucker team were able to hit out of the park in "Airplane!" (1980). Becuase of them, it's so hard now to watch these movies with a straight face anymore. In short, this is an unintentional comedy classic.

Best Bit:
Son: "Who's that, Mommy?"
Mother: "That's your grandpa."
Son: "Have I ever met him?"
Mother: "Oh, once or twice."

Side Note:
The costumes were designed by old Hollywood warhorse Edith Head, also rapidly reaching the end of her career.

Companion Viewing:
"The Poseidon Adventure" (1972) and "Airport" (1970).

Links:
IMDb.
AirOdyssey.
Movie Mistakes.

Take a Look:
The thrilling crash scene: