Friday, October 12, 2007

Volcano (1997).

The Scoop:
"Volcano" isn't just a dumb movie -- it's a Big Dumb Movie. And they don't get much dumber or goofier than this.

Basically, a great big hidden volcano tries to push its way up through Wilshire Boulevard in Los Angeles. Tommy Lee Jones, Anne Heche, Gabby Hoffman and Don Cheadle try to stop it. Or something. The plot doesn't make much sense, and the characters make even less. But what you do get is plenty of bogus geological information, plenty of fire and explosions, plenty of L.A. landmarks being destroyed, plenty of running around, and plenty of bad dialogue and overacting. But most of all, you get clichés -- lots and lots of your favorite movie clichés.

The end result is a cheeseball classic for the ages.

Best Lines:
Oh, there are just so many, where do I begin?
"You don't understand -- he's my responsibility!"
"It burns! It burns!"
"Man, this Hieronymous Bosch is heavy!"
"I'm about to become the volcano version of Rodney King!"
"There's no history of anything until it happens. Then there is."


Side Note:
This was nominated for a Razzie for "Worst Reckless Disregard for Human Life and Public Property," but lost out to "Con Air."

Companion Viewing:
"Dante's Peak" (1997).

Links:
IMDb.

Take a Look:
Oh no! Not Angelyne!


Um... Can 12" of concrete really stop a raging lava flow?


The Beverly Center is demolished by unnecessary zooms:

3 comments:

Fred said...

I've never seen the movie, but I think I want "There's no history of anything until it happens." on a T-shirt.

Eric B. said...

It's one of those choice films every bad movie fan owes it to themselves to see at least once. Maybe you can watch it after your visit next year, when you'll appreciate it more.

The "history" line is indeed great. So are plenty of others, not so much for what they say as for their context. My favorite is probably the Hieronymous Bosch exchange, which is quoted more fully at the top of IMDb's quotes page: http://us.imdb.com/title/tt0120461/quotes

Fred said...

It's no "I'm not a pound of sugar, I'm a primatologist!" from Congo, but it's not bad. (Or, rather, it is bad. Hopelessly and horribly bad. But in a good way.)